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Jamaica
One of the big islands in the caribbean. The capital, Kingstown is the murder capital of the world, which I am sure the mayor is really bloody proud of. Jamaica was the birthplace of bob marley and reggae music, which just puts me to sleep. The rasta religion is pretty much based in jamaica and brought the world dreads and colourful hats. Beaches and majijuana also feature highly in its reputation, which when you think about it sounds pretty bloody cool
travel advice-just turn down your walkman man
Japan
Nihonlandia. A fascinating and contradictory country japan is really rather confusing. Japan had nothing to do with the outside world for hundreds of years until tom cruise apparently showed up and showed them how being short was really fab. Unfortunately conformism and and racism informed japan that it should rule the world and, starting off with china, they set off in doing so. They took over most of south east asia and were heading to australia when they narked the americans by trying to blow up ben affleck. They treated the peoples they conquered with disdain and massacred, raped and destroyed them. They reacted to their defeat by the allies (principally the americans) by copying everything they did. Still, they have fantastic food, very welcoming people and gorgeous shinto shrines and buddhist temples.
travel advice-go to tokyo zoo and free the sun bear one!
Jordan
Not Michael, nor the big booby one that married that twat. it's a country in the middle east, home of everything that is secular and sensible. Also home to Petra, the mind bogglingly beautiful city caved into the earth by an ancient culture. Beavis went there and had big hair. They have a royal family and they had the golan heights nicked by the Israelis. They also like to play funny games in lebanon by blowing up elected politicians.
travel advice-look at petra and then scarper.
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
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