我在2018年去了那里！

慕田峪  is a section of 中国的长城 located in 怀柔 District within the city limits of 北京  70 kilometers northeast of the of the city centre. 

super hans, font of wisdom

Mots pressés, mots sensés, mots qui disent la vérité...

shibboleth

juggernaut

behemoth

leviathon

tex, kim et french al telling it like is, was and will be

misheard lyrics no. 5 - Rod Stewart - The First Cut Is The Deepest

originally written by folk tediast michi stevens

he found it all too overwhelmingly saucy so he changed his name to allah biscuits (the twat)

the first thrust is the deepest became a hit for several other soft rock peddling turds

and it lives on in shit pubs to this day

tricking sickeningly smoochy couples into singing along to carnal filth

flight of the conquistacords

bark rubbing of some marauding bloody hippies, budapest circa 2500bce

Before 3000 bce, europe was mainly inhabited by punks, mods, rastas and skins and things were going smashingly, with dolmens, wild boars and goat flavoured g strings.

Alas, hordes of massed hippies arrived in the 2970's BCE. Like pretty much everybody else,  it involved a massive migration into the heartland of Europe from its eastern periphery, the Eurasiatic steppes. (but this time involved dragging about proto grateful dead a capella boy bands of their day.

Known as the Corded Ware culture with terrible textured and flared trousers and mung beans. they hung around and stunk up the place from the late Neolithic, through the Copper Age, and ending in the early Bronze Age. (circa 2376 BCE) this 500 year reign of of terror involved incense, shit clothes and tedious music that really brought everybody down, man, and lead to the extinction of the eurocordy wildebeest, which they slaughtered to make horrendous primitive clothing.

prosit!

the fat white rubbery fucker known to anglophones as the michelin man

is actually a raging alcoholic

his name in french as 'bibendum'

which literally translates from latin as 'drinking'

a ton sante bibebebe!

What do you get when you kiss a girl?

You get enough germs to catch pneumonia

After you do, she'll never phone you...

scarcely rhodesian horseplay

if you squint really hard you can see the goal posts (or tarquin bâtons) and a poloser next to his own goal with his horse mr schned's arse facing the field.

i took to the polo field once

in the formerly glorious zim land of the shona and ndebele

no

not water bash'ems polo

not segaioloway polo

nor pushbikey polo

but real polo

you know

the one with big galumping horsies

and cumberbatch sandwiches

they say you have to show the horse confidence and who is boss

otherwise they they will do whatever the fuck they like

as this was the first time i had ridden a horse

 i was scared shitless

and mr schned horsey had me figured in seconds

thus i spent much of the game, on the edge of the field, facing the wrong way on a steadfastly immobile horse

not having a clue what was going on

little pigs little pigs let me in... to your crush your fucking skull!

mimesis?

nop

its futemime!

shock!/choque!/choc!/шок!

sip el hombre invincible ruso gano su referendum

que sorpresa!

se puede estar seguro que el proceso fuera 107.7% legitimo

(como minimo)

como siempre en putinlandia

asi va ser presidente para siempre

be, por el resto de su vida de mierda

pon esto en tu шок y frielo!

unfinished intense monkey business

what makes him... Summer?

temperature drop in downtown winterland

its getting a bit chilly on the willy of late here in inner north winterland

of course its all relative

like your mamma!

its nothing like winter splinter bay in lapland

or melting with the spring snows in archangel

or autumn soon at mount erebus

or

worst of all

one more summer in surf city, brummagem

why gwyn talks like a pirate

                                      newton trying to get his leg over with yet another bird

Robert Newton was an English nutter. Along with (cool/australian) Errol Flynn, Newton was one of the more popular actors among the male and extremefuckingmente juvenile audience of the 1940s and early 1950s, especially with British nobbers. Known for his hard-living lifestyle, he was cited as a role model by the actor Oliver Reed and the Who's drummer Keith Moon (both famously balanced individuals).

He's best remembered today for playing Long John Schlong in Treasure Island (1950) and its sequel in 1954. His portrayal of Long John Schlong and of Blackbutt, the Pirate (1952) created a persona that was so indelible that his vocal intonations created the paradigm for scores of people who want to "Talk Like a Pirate".

Which is exemplified by,  in the 1970's, when young roustabout and aspiring corsair gwyn (growing up on the mean streets of soapytitwank, westcountria) began to speak exactly the same as newton coz as has been scientifically verified, all west country accents are identical in every way.

so long courtney

supercool courtney gives leonard a healthy strayan twang and does it quite beautifully