Portfolio eye view of the world T - Part 1

T
Tajikistan
One of my favourite stans, right up their with stanislaw from poland via scotland and northcote, stan the man longanidis, stan lazaridis, stanley knife and stan stan he's our man, if he cant do it a no one can. Central asia, probably and unfortunately islamic and former ussr victims. The capital is dushanbe which is was made famous in spies like us when dan akyroyd and bill murray were looking for the road to it...
travel advice-advance your feet in that familiar left foot-right foot combination until you get to the road to dushanbe

Tanzania
no, its not pronounced tanZANIA, as much fun as that would be. tanzania is pretty cool all things considered, they have the biggest mountain in africa (maybe) mt kilimanjaro which i saw over thar once. They also have the ngorgoro crater which is completely bulk ace and lots of giraffes wombling about the place. It consists of tanganyika and zanzibar (which is really, truly fab), ha, i bet you didnt know that!
travel advice-go look at all the groovy animals and err watch broken arrow on the ferry to zanzibar. (where summer days are hot)

Thailand
At the moment thailand is really pretty dire, protests and handgrenades and pharangs locked up in bagners airport. they also have a corrupt regime, and a stupid islamist insurgency down south. More groovily, catherine lived their for a bit and i went to visit her. it was a way posh place with a big swimmy poolly, pretty porcelain doll thai girls, enormous wankers australian expats and proper hot chilli dishes that wanna hard men gringos nearly have their heads blown off. It is also famous for elephants and temples and pervy perv shows. Formerly known as siam, it was the only country is that part of asia not to be colonised, which maybe explains their contempt for pharangs, which really is a bit rich. (it must be true coz catherine told me so)
travel advice-dont go there til the airport opens again, it would bite the big one at present.

Tibet
its a bloody country! dont believe the maggoty han chinese with their horrid scummy attempts to legitimise their annexing of tibet. they can go make in an arse!
notable tibetans include the daily llama and the bloke from the beastie boys.
travel advice/challenge - tell a chinese person to get the fuck out of tibet and stay alive...

Togo
Not to be confused with tojo, who never made it to, never made it to, never made it to .. darwin. Togo is a country, not a warmongering japanese admiral fucker. Its most likely in west africa, coz i dont know where it is. Emanual adebeyor is from there and he is a brill footballer who plays for arsenal. Famous togoians-not tojo
travel advice-travel is good, travel is golden, travel can be done in the back of a holden

Tonga
Tis in the south pacific, near samoa probably and i went there when i was very short. They still have a monarchy and lots of groovy traditions about sitting in circles with funky kit on. They also export many of their thugs called tuali to australia to terrorise innocent people in high schools and stand around out the front of pubs and clubs looking monolithic.
travel advice-dont pick fights in tonga unless you want your head removed and shoved up you arse.