Sunday, February 26, 2023

mijn wunderkammer (random worldy finds encountered whilst sorting) 2 - kathputli



kathputli or rajasthani dolls
are marionettes that have been around for at least 1500 years
made of wood
and colourful cloth
by the nomadic bhat community
and were used in puppet shows for Rajasthan’s royal and aristocratic families 
to tell the old stories of the rajasthani tribal people, including their way of life, customs, and beliefs.
(and know what you did behind the bike sheds you pervert)




Wednesday, February 22, 2023

revolting bangers




much more fun than hatchet faced big noses famous cheesefest of a late 70's effort
with a pounding beat and big al's menacing (bordering on stabby) seductive tones
making the whole thing a raunching great shagnasty just waiting to happen

if you have a night out imminent and you arent feeling too perky
put this on and crank it up to eleventy
and you will be bouncing off the walls in no time...

woof woof!



Monday, February 20, 2023

El incidentazo (larguisimo)




cuando
hay tres personas en el hueco de escalera
donde no hay escape
y uno esta desangrandose fatalmente
con un chorro de  mochilas, botellas de plastica llenas de caca, envolturas de comida de basura y mucho mas
y pues solo dos y el esqueleto del otro
cuel fue el motivo del robo?
que habia hecho el hermano antes?


yyy

hay una familia en un carro en la carretera rural
donde no se puede salir de la zona
en cada direccion se vuelve al mismo lugar
una gasolinera sin persona
y una la nena que se murio de asthma


pero.. 
por que se pasan estas dos situaciones?
y cual fue la conexion entre las dos cuentas?
y el gran ruido/explosion.. 
que significa?


boh!


Saturday, February 18, 2023

englisc innit?


 

those odd noises you make
or try to make
could have sounded very different indeed

if
that bill bastard had stayed at (his newish) home
that his grandfather had stolen
in an impure manner

if
later clever clogses
didnt try to make englisc (and themselves) sound more cleverer
by ramming it full of latin and greek terms
about science etc

if
other clever clogseses
hadnt kept dipping into french
to (again) make themselves sound more clevererer

if 
other clever clogseseses
hadnt violently rammed the square germanic peg that was englisc
into the round hole of latinate grammar

if
in the last 400 or so years the inhabitants of englisclandia
had kept it in their rather small pants
and not gone off pillaging large parts of the planet
for their goods/people
and most saliently 
for their interesting sounding words

if 
those things hadnt happened


ðon englisc ðrýð faran âwrîtan lîcian ðês!     

(or probably not)



Wednesday, February 15, 2023

Hardcore Henry - no, not like that




well that was fun
bang bang!
splat splat!
boom boom!
bigger splat bigger splat!
russian baddies!
blonde wigged sex ladies!
that saffer bloke who keeps coming back!
futuristic sci fi robotic trickery!
jumping from great heights!
first person extreme violence!

отличный!


Monday, February 13, 2023

Little Johnny Jewel no mas





buggrit johnny
mighty tom verlaine has checked out too
oh well
we'll always have the backyard at smugmas
four continents in less than a week 
and the associated accumulated jet lag fuckery
only made television all the more wondrous


i see
i see no
i see no eviiiil!



Friday, February 10, 2023

mijn wunderkammer (random worldy finds encountered whilst sorting) 1 - fez medina map

 



put your left foot in
take your left foot out
good luck on your fucking whereabouts...



Tuesday, February 07, 2023

balloons and pricks





theres been a lot of hot air about some chinese made balloons of late

who ever knew that china made balloons?

those balloons have floated over some american nations

causing all kinds of conniptions from hysterical snowflake gringo conservative buffoons 

screeching - they are spy satellites!

evilly piloted above godsownlandia for dastardly nefarious reasons!

and war! war! war!

(what is it good for? - the military industrial complex)

OR

are they just weather balloons gone astray?

as is most fucking likely


was a $20 weather balloon

shot down with a $380000 aim 9x missile?


como se dice 'overreaction' in gringlés?



imagine if it had looked like this!

 


there would have been a dino balloon induced nuclear armageddon!


(info and pic stolen from the estimable argenchino)



Saturday, February 04, 2023

se i migliori mobili volete comprare...






... oggi, domani e sempre
da franco cozzo dovete andare

poi...

franco cozzo
per la prima volta in australia
dichiara la guerra!
guerra ai prezzi
grande svendita!


ah quanti bei ricordi!
la caconofia
tante frasi/parole incomprensibili
che roba esotica!

(purtroppo e un po meno divertente quando si capisce cosa dice)




Thursday, February 02, 2023

All I really need is Sister Ray




something something ding dong...



Tuesday, January 31, 2023

The spread of humanity via mtDNA or the MOTHER of all flounces





Yeah, well... I'm gonna go build my own branch of humanity, with blackjack and hookers...




Sunday, January 29, 2023

esto no se ve para nada amenazador...





para los jovenes, miren este documental sobre el futuro proximo de erasmus jr jr jr






Thursday, January 26, 2023

हिंदुस्तान जिंदाबाद! (et changez la date en terra australis putain!)






on est de nouveau a cette date
ouaip
le jour de la republique indienne!
vive la republique!

on espere que un jour mon pays aura le meme courage
et aussi ici on peut celebrer 
une fete similair
(mas a une date differente!)


भारतीय गणतंत्र अमर रहे!
(neuf autres alphabets sont également applicables)







 

Tuesday, January 24, 2023

zei tu tedesca? o la stranezza dei nomi diversi per i tedeschi nelle lingue europee



nemets

german

deutsch

aleman

tedesco

niemiecki



was zum teufel?


Friday, January 20, 2023

stereo gringotypes - their geography knowledge is shitful





cnn leads the way




but cnnnn really takes the biskwit







 

Wednesday, January 18, 2023

mier...coles!



(ah bueno, mirafuckinglo en yutub entonces...)

si tienes justo un poquito de miedo a volar... ponte los pañales!



credito a ese pobre (ex) güey




Sunday, January 15, 2023

PARENTI SERPENTI - che colpone di scena!





ciao e grazie per tutto cari genitori...

io non l'ho previsto per niente!



Friday, January 13, 2023

vale terry (sans towelling)


barmy army trumpeter playing ghost town in karachi pakistania shortly after terrys departure



generally i think the barmy army are pretty lame
usually doing the same old shit over and over again
eg shouting barmy army! repeatedly for hours on end
as they get lobsterised by the brutal southern sun

but they do have moments of that bri£ish comedic genius
or in the above case, of poignancy
(without the stabby, stabby obvs)




late to the party as always
i only got into the specials decades late
 that's what two tone meant?

last memorably heard in the foothills of the himAlayas
out of time and place but never inappropriate

fanx for the choons



Wednesday, January 11, 2023

i mondiali di catarrro 2022 - il riassunto

 



+



=

bahahhahhhahhaha!




Monday, January 09, 2023

slainte! nó b'fhéidir nach bhfuil...




a miniature donkey
some bleak but pretty scenery
explosions in the distance
a nice bloke that bangs on too much
a cranky artistic bloke that doesnt like being banged on at
a line drawn
heedless
the nice bloke bangs on
a finger cut off and flung at a door
a feisty sister
heedless
the nice bloke bangs on again
four more digits cut off and flung at door
a dead miniature donkey
feisty sister does one
nice banging on bloke loses his shit
burns down cranky artistic blokes house
explosions in the distance die down
a metaphor?
formerly nice banging on bloke 
isnt nice any more
becomes menacing bloke that bangs on
impending doom abounds ...


ó cac!



Wednesday, January 04, 2023

Monday, January 02, 2023

racism is fucking stupid no. 46663 : curious yellow


How did Asians go from being called “white” to “yellow”



 

In “The Travels of Marco Polo,” the people of China are described as “white.” Records left by eighteenth century missionaries also report the skin color of Japanese and other East Asian people as clearly white. Yet in the nineteenth century, this perception quietly gave way to descriptions as “yellow.” In travel books, scientific discourse, and works of art, portrayals of East Asians began presenting them as having yellow skin.What happened in between?

 

In his 2011 book “Becoming Yellow: A Short History of Racial Thinking,” National Taiwan University professor Michael Keevak delves deeply into the origins and history of how and why East Asians went from being seen as “white” to being classified as “yellow.”


The first suspect implicated in applying the “yellow” label to East Asian faces is the famed Carl Linnaeus (1707-78). At first, Linnaeus used the Latin adjective “fuscus,” meaning “dark,” to describe the skin color of Asians. But in the tenth edition of his 1758-9 “Systema Naturae,” he specified it with the term “luridus,” meaning “light yellow” or “pale.” 

 

It was Johann Friedrich Blumenbach (1752-1840) who went beyond the coloring ascribed by Linnaeus to apply the completely different label of “Mongolianness.” Regarded as a founder of comparative anatomy, the German zoologist did more than just use the Latin word “gilvus,” meaning “light yellow,” to describe East Asian skin color: he also implicated the Mongols, a name with troubling and threatening connotations for Europeans with their memories of Attila the Hun, Genghis Khan, and Timur.


While the references remained anomalous at first, travelers to East Asia gradually began describing locals there more and more as “yellow.” By the nineteenth century, Keevak argued, the “yellow race” become a key part of anthropology. 

 

 But the yellow label came associated with discrimination, exclusion, and violence. Just as no one in the world is purely white or black, neither does anyone actually have skin that is deep yellow. By “creating” a skin color and investing traits such as “Mongolian eyes,” the Mongolian birthmark, and mongolism (the old name for Down syndrome), Westerners made the perceived yellow race synonymous with abnormality. They also responded to the arrival of immigrants from Asia by sounding the alarm over the “yellow peril” - a term with a whole range of negative associations from overpopulation to heathenism, economic competition, and political and social regression. The hidden agenda of this racial color-coding becomes apparent when one considers who benefits from a hierarchy that places “yellow” and “black” beneath “white.”

 

stolen from https://english.hani.co.kr/arti/english_edition/e_international/753623.html


Saturday, December 31, 2022

Friday, December 30, 2022

ll... its a (tourist) trap!




By the second half of the 1800s, queen vics leon was getting larger and train travel was becoming more and more accessible for the richer plebs of blightylandia. Railway perversion tourism was growing too, and kinky stations were popping up all across the country. The people of Llanfairpwll weren’t about to miss out on this railway tourism boom, so they decided to come up with a gimmick that would see people disembark at their train station in vast numbers. The gimmick chosen? Llanfair­pwllgwyngyll­gogery­chwyrn­drobwll­llan­tysilio­gogo­goch. And fair play to them.



The year was 1869 and bums were getting squeaky, an anonymous tailor came up with the idea of the comedically long name. It wasn’t entirely random, and the translated version of the name offers up plenty of geographical and natural clues. Llanfair­pwllgwyngyll­gogery­chwyrn­drobwll­llan­tysilio­gogo­goch means ‘St Mary’s Church in the Hollow of the White Hazel Near to the Rapid Whirlpool of Llantysilio of the Red Cave’, a collection of geographical and cultural features that are all found in the vicinity of the village and apt for some comedy scammage. It became the longest train station name on the planet, and the visitors f**cked to check it out.


skill magill!


it could ALMOST make the proposed pub name of theplacewherepissedbastardshangoutat seem slightly bless absurd.

but it can't shan't and won't



picked from in your pocket



Tuesday, December 27, 2022

kylie threatens to sue, who's sue? is kylie going mad?



there was once a non boy named who's sue
she lived a cyclable distance away
in a not so far off land called Großer Wannsee
she smoked menthols
she was strawberry blonde and had freckles
and had many siblings
she was pretty bland really

we met at a debutante ball
and hung out for many months
but neither of us were really convinced

sues best friend was named jo
she had short brown hair
and a gap between her front teeth
she loved the the
jo was cool
much cooler than sue

anyway back to who's sue

after not hanging out for a while
we hooked up again
and it was predictably underwhelming
and it ended pretty damn quickly


as a mate at the time sang repeatedly at me
(in an appropriately bothersome high pitched squeal)

sues history
no good for you
na na na na na... 




Wednesday, December 21, 2022

fact schmact - side, burn baby burn... whisker inferno



burnside burning up the confederate side


before side burns were known as such

they were known as burnsides

which took their name from ambrose burnside

a gringo uncivil war general


nb. he may also been known as 'that furry faced tosspot'

nb.2 they assumedly had several other names before the burnmeister, but you know, nothing noteworthy ever happened until gringolandia arrived on the scene.🙄



 

Monday, December 19, 2022

every fucking city








once again PK nails the strayan experience
with this ultimate backpackers tale

the excitement
the disillusion
the backpacker rites
churches, bars, stations etc
the array of random nationalities met
the bafflingly constantly changing languages
the drinking
the lust
the sense of displacement
the apparent sameness of all the diverse places
all rings uncannily true

i can order sandwiches in 15 languages...

did he experience it as a backpacker?
did he experience it as a gigging musician?
or did he just weave together random experiences 
overheard, imagined and lived
as all great story tellers do?


en tout cas he gets it bang fucking on once again
(and ive no doubt many other backpackers from various nations could relate)


Arrivederci, au revoir, auf Wiedersehen, hasta la vista ... baby



Friday, December 16, 2022

spot the twat no.15 THE OBVIOUS ONE



the arch lord of twatistan has his own trading cards
and the above image is not a clever piece of satire
and if you are truly, truly stupid
you can pay $99 gringodolares for one
claiming they are
'very much like a baseball card, but hopefully much more exciting'


yes
i know
its fucking painfully self evident
after all
he might be the most famously enormous twat of recent decades

but he can no longer be ignored
his latest scam of selling his own 'digital trading card'
just screams 'IM A FUCKING HUGE, ALMOST UNFATHOMABLY APPALLING TWAT'



Wednesday, December 14, 2022

Beavis & Butthead do no.34 - Cinderella




butt, butt, butt, butt, butt, butt, butt, butt, butt...




Monday, December 12, 2022

Nothing Compares 2Urinating standing up


i never really got sinead as a teen 
when i was getting into music
i wasnt inspired by furious post catholic female angst
despite the lovely jassy giving me the big hit 7 inch single for my 17th bday
in a bland shopping centre reproduced from a gringo corporate masterplan
that could have been in istanbul, johannesburg or bogota
(you too could look like arseville dakota!)
she just seemed like a funny talented madwoman

from a distance
she came across as a nutter
and a nutter she was
but she had a fucking point
(and it wasnt just that her trousers had rucked up!)
her rants about the catholic church were light years ahead of world events
and the doc has shown her to be far from the sensationalist freak that she was portrayed as at the time
she didnt shave her head to shock
she didnt say ugly truths to shock
she was bucking against the vicious hyper conservative ireland in which she lived

then she got ordained by some side church lot
later she became a muslim
because thats the only thinking christian thing to do etc etc

fuck all that sky high
she was a mighty brave, talented beast
in the form of a petite young woman
who faced an epic torrent of shit
from the (almighty) establishment
starring the self serving cuntery behemoth that is the catholic church
and the febrile bastion of ignorance which is the gringo christian right
((who wouldnt know a jebus if he showed up and shat in their letterboxes) AND left a calling card))
amongst others
which left an irreparable dent in her career

still
she did gain worldwide notoriety
(not that she sought it)




so much so that she became an ep cover
by the ultimate iconoclasts
after they got legally ken doned

btw 
i wonder how elke is doing...





Saturday, December 10, 2022

how to measure like a brit

 



step one - remove any logical thoughts from brain
step two - good fucking luck

those lovely eccentric nutmegs, complicating life for no good reason







Friday, December 09, 2022

back in metropolis





You could sleep along the way
Dream in black and white...





Tuesday, December 06, 2022

fug life, tales of nonadventure 2





im fucked with being fucked ...





Sunday, December 04, 2022

fug life, tales of nonadventure



tis a shit pick up line...







Friday, December 02, 2022

catarrh world cup update 2/12/22





 


this years world cup has been happily FULL of surprises


THE SUPRISERS

saudi! beat argentina!

japan! beat germany and spain and topped the group!

morocco! beat belgium and canada, drew with croatia. topped the group!

australia! beat denmark and tunisia and through



THE SURPRISEES

germany! lost to japan and OUT!

belgium! lost to morocco and OUT!

denmark! lost to australia, drew with tunisia and OUT!

catarrh! lost all games despite spending billions on stealing other nations players and FIRST OUT!



TWATS

ronaldo! tried to claim a team mates goal and was generally true his nature (a prat)

suarez! still pleased with himself for blatant past cheating

FIFA! still counting their billions of rials and pretending that human lives/rights dont matter

 


Monday, November 28, 2022

as we enter the fourth year...

 


I find covid's attention seeking pandemic based twattery even more annoying than years one to three...






Sunday, November 27, 2022

hey j league, why no ichi ban thunderbastard dream lemurs?

ever wonder why japanese football teams have such comedic names?
if you speak a romance language (or german or dutch) it gets even funnier
which priceless linguistic clusterfuck is your team of cuore?
among the quality choices are-
tokyo greeny
leg osaka
kashima antlers
omiya squirrellel
yokahama s marinerereras
kawasaki frontal
kashima kingsun
windforest kofu
joy iwata





チーム不条理に行く!





Thursday, November 24, 2022

evviva! qualcuno ha una mucchiata di candele?





e cosa abbiamo vinto?


------------


e per smentire una diceria banale che non muore mai...









Sunday, November 20, 2022

help us santo sam and ed, youre our only hope! (at qatar 2022)




alas this is one empire that isnt striking back


at least we have tism not showing their faces again...




Friday, November 18, 2022

spot the twat no.14 - Gregoire de Fournas du RN






L'indignation à l'Assemblée nationale après des propos racistes. Lorsqu'un député noir prend la parole sur les migrants, un député du Rassemblement national crie "qu'il(s) retourne(nt) en Afrique"

parlait-il du navire ? pas du tout

on voit bien que le RN est toujours la meme merde raciste du FN que jamais, mais sous un nouveau déguisement.

fucking con repere'!





Wednesday, November 16, 2022

decision to quoi?



je n'avais rien compris.
comment c'etait possible que le type vivait avec la femme chinoise dans le milieu du film?
et apres, il n'a jamais été mentionné?

a part ca, c'est canon
만세!




Tuesday, November 15, 2022

All who have passed the age of thirty are joyless grotesques...

 


... endlessly fussing about things of no importance and staying alive, without, (so far as the child can see), having anything to live for. 


we are now further past the date for the setting of george orwells envisioned dystopia than that time is from when he wrote it.

coño eh?



Sunday, November 13, 2022

we had the best time at your party




the wife and i thank you very much...




i dont know why
but i fucking love this song
it is damn hilarious
for a reason that cannot pin down
is it a piss take of adult MOR muzak?
a commentary on modern middle agers?
and is there just the faintest hint of swingerdom?

ween are known for all kinds of musical whackiness
but displaying real fucking genius
they can also make a 'straight' tune
thats swings along magnificently
seemingly without effort



Friday, November 11, 2022

le faux pas par excellence

 


'Le jour de la commémoration de la nuit du pogrom du Reich, offrez-vous un fromage plus tendre avec le poulet croustillant. maintenant chez kfcheese.'


ouaip, tu l'as bien lu.

kfc en allemagne a envoye un message 'push' sur sa application que suggere de celebrer 'kristallnacht', l'evenement vu comme le commencement de la shoah allemagne des juifs. genial! on va se souvenir le genocide avec la poule et frommage!

bravo! vous avez mis le pied taille trente dans votre bouche corporative!



Wednesday, November 09, 2022

juan heet juandas - the passions - im in love with a german film star




in the full post punk fundom of 1981
the passions put out a banger of a track
it was written by the vocalist about a former sex pistols and clash roadie
who had been a some german flix
no not that kind...

hows that for fucking random?

what attracted her to him?
was it that she had prescient knowledge that he would one day act in a film called 'penetration angst'?
did they ever get it on?
if so, was it angsty?


stay tuned to not find out a shitting thing!



Sunday, November 06, 2022

transcrivint els ploros de rivers a València




once upon a time i went to valencia in spain
not
not palencia
nor
fnaalencia
nor valencia in venezuela, mexico, brazil
nor the other 54 other places called valencia

it was the tail end of summer
and it was lovely and sunny
i went there to visit carmen
 a cool chica i had met in rainy londres el ano pasado

despite me missing train stations 
and getting the hostels address wrong
(due to being a monoglot fool)
super patient carmen was a genial host

we went to a friends country place
with a bunch of her mates
ate REAL paella
(que es la unica paella que vale la pena, insistieron!)
and had a fun old time
(one of them was even a church fan!)

on the days when carmen was busy doing her thing
i wandered the town 
like a touristic clown
and one time 
ended up in an irish pub

in between pints of so so guinness
i got chatting with a couple of lovely valencian chicas
who were sitting there with a walkman
(old skool)
with their freshly purchased copy of pinkerton
trying to figure out the words
the were BIIIIG fans

they roped me into trying to figure out and transcribe
whatever the hell rivers cuomo was banging on about

i had heard some weezer
buddy holly obvs
that music vid!
and thought they were fun and pretty cool

but after an hour or so of trying to make sense of lyrics
i came to the conclusion that
rivers cuomo is a whiny little bitch
who just moaned about how hard his life is
in particular the being a rock star part

fun and cool?
more like moany and self indulgent
ive barely bothered to listen to them again
vés-te'n a la merda rivers



Friday, November 04, 2022

Zhōngguó on laowai...






honest, intelligent and thoughtful

去他妈的种族主义!


Wednesday, November 02, 2022

on this day dos - the scots did a hing

2nd November 1698 Scottish settlers make landfall in Panama, establishing the ill-fated 'Darien Venture' colony



Q - how did that work oot for ye hamish?

A 1 - (care of colonist Roger Oswald) ‘{Flour rations} When boiled with a little water, without anything else, big maggots and worms must be skimmed off the top… In short, a man might easily have destroyed his whole week’s ration in one day and have but one ordinary stomach neither… Yet for all this short allowance, every man (let him never be so weak) daily turned out to work by daylight, whether with the hatchet, or wheelbarrow, pick-axe, shovel, fore-hammer or any other instrument the case required; and so continued until 12 o’clock, and at 2 again and stayed till night, sometimes working all day up to the headbands of the breeches in water at the trenches. My shoulders have been so wore with carrying burdens that the skin has come off them and grew full of boils. If a man were sick and obliged to stay within, no victuals for him that day. Our Councillors all the while lying at their ease, sometimes divided into factions and, being swayed by particular interest, ruined the public… Our bodies pined away and grew so macerated with such allowance that we were like so many skeletons.’

A 2 - 






Sunday, October 30, 2022

eat local, think global





if you fucking can!

 


Friday, October 28, 2022

(CI SONO) FASCISTI SU MARTE, STATE ATTENTI CENERE BOYS!


    in the nineties the youngster funsters of ash made a bit of a splash with their rambunctious tunes
one of the catchiest was
 girl from mars





ma
20 anni dopo si e stata trovata della prova cinematica che forse era 
una ragazza mimimmi fascista!






Wednesday, October 26, 2022

juan heet juandas- god- my pal




16 and 17 year olds
the late 1980s
melby osstraya
pub rock monsterism
tunefully smashing and bashing
parnks not ded fred
vale th and sg

and you dont even like me...


Monday, October 24, 2022

Beavis & Butthead do no. 33 - james





-hey butthead who is this buttknocker anyways?
-this is james 
-james who?
-his parents asked him not to use their last name, because its like, he sucks...




Friday, October 21, 2022

Ce verimm' aròppo Gomorra



nooo...
si e' finito mo
tutte le 5 serie
tutte le 58 puntate
non ce piu ciruzzo
neanche genna
idem sangue blu, monacielo, don pietro, scianel, patrizia la figa ecc ecc
che tristezza guagliu
niente piu della bellezza e della bruttezza di napoli e campania
niente piu gergo napulitano

grazie assaje per il viaggio




Tuesday, October 18, 2022

Sometimes...



i miss old blighty...




sometimes






not so much...




Thursday, October 13, 2022

Tuesday, October 11, 2022

Saló - o le 120 giornate di roba squillibrata



ma porchi stronzi!
il povero pasolini c'e l'ha fatta alla grande per il suo ultimo film
eccome!
purtroppo e stato assassinato prima della uscita del film
nelle circonstanze davvero particolari
il film era bannato in vari paesi per decenni
per la sua perversione/offese alle virtu ecc ecc
le solite sciocchezze
e francamente il girone della merda 
non era molto piacevole
ma e l'arte!

quindi bravo PPP
hai fatto un capolavoro
ma non credo che lo guardero di nuovo prestissimo

non dire
va a caga....















Sunday, October 09, 2022

Peron, el boludisimo



toda esta charla de indoctrinacion
de la patria
de las generaciones que vienen
de fucking group think
de vestir a los ninos es uniformes marciales
son espantosos
no es por casualidad
que hacen eco 
de los fascistas alemanes y italianos

claro que fue de moda
en este epoca

pero 
si un dia tu lider
esta campion de los sindicatos
y el otro 
es manipulador en jefe de los servicios secretos

hay que preguntar
que representa?


no piensen!
no pregunten!
siguen y basta!


(al menos no invadio a la polonia)


Thursday, October 06, 2022

Beavis & Butthead do no. 32 - Motörhead -



- "How come Lemmy has those two big coco puffs stuck to his cheek?
- "Because it looks cool"


Tuesday, October 04, 2022

Go to London, I guarantee you'll either be mugged or not appreciated...





... Catch the train to London, stopping at Rejection, Disappointment, Backstabbing Central and Shattered Dreams Parkway.




 

Saturday, October 01, 2022

Friday, September 30, 2022

desk of sport



in the 19th and early 20th centuries
a popular sport in lancashire
was clog fighting!
it involved kicking your opponent in the shins
while wearing wooden clogs
which were often sharpened or had metal attached
until one of the competitors cried
'sufficient!'

bloody shinned cristos on a segway!


 

Tuesday, September 27, 2022

The Innocents (ou pas)



en ironisk tittel eller hva?

spooky little fuckers...



Friday, September 23, 2022

Semper Fatuum




freedom is the only way, yeah!




Tuesday, September 20, 2022

fittipaldi corre per fratelli d'italia come candidato all'estero

 


che cretino dalle basette gigantesche

spero che il suo patetico ritardato veicolo del cazzo si esploda alla partenza

vai tomar no cu!



Sunday, September 18, 2022

Måneskin - VENT'ANNI (o meno) di qualsiasismo



allora
dopo piu di un anno di vederli menzionati sul feis 
da quando hanno vinto il trashovision
mi sono rimasto cosi
wao que competenza
come sono famosi per il euroschifo, avevo degli idea specifici di come sarebbero stati
ma no.. non sono patetici
cmq
non ce niente di originale

prende un po di interpol
e mette un po di yeah yeah yeahs
poi qualche goccia di the strokes
e un dash di ligabue
e eccoli

una banda adeguata
e basta


Thursday, September 15, 2022

Beavis and Butthead do no.31- shaggy


- what is this, this accent hes talking?
- dumbass, its foreign



Tuesday, September 13, 2022

Saturday, September 10, 2022

stonking gig thatll be

 




but no

it wont

not for me anyway

ive been waiting for this gig for years

had my tix sitting in my inbox for months

new songs from new album to flog

new lineup to smash it

(with two drummers!)

and legendary new guitarist 

taking the place of legendary old guitarist

making this version of the crunch

something of an oz supergruppo

of course

like all old bastards

i still wish it was the original lineup

from the belle epoque

with bully boy spot on the drums

jamming good with weird and gilly


but im not THAT sad of a bastard 

who demands that time stands still 

so i can witness exactly what blew my mind at the end of the victorian era

and those are truly plentiful

when it comes to bands like these


- yeah i mean, after bestie left the beatles

they were never the same

they sold out man

or 

- ive got the third acetate audio microfiche of the first single

from andy lovely and the jubblies

all that wax cylinder shite is for try hards



nevermind all that bollocks

i was still keen to dig it and wiggle a bit from side to side

the few newies ive come across sound promising

so i was (un)guardedly emozionato about the show

and the reviews of the current tour have been ravey wavey


alas

it was not (to) essere

so its

left me lying here with you, tristesse



Wednesday, September 07, 2022

language schmanguage


all power to dialects!



Saturday, September 03, 2022

on this day... cristoforo fece una belinata




on august 3rd 1492
old cristoforo colombo took his belin and got on a boat
in palos de la frontera in spain
and set off to cause an absolute casino 
on a global scale

leading to the deaths of hundreds of millions of people
and a lot of general racist cuntery
and
trump


bravo cristoforo!


Thursday, September 01, 2022

beep beep うん!




super movie that!
thought provoking
with multi language capers
(not all spoken)
gorgeous asian ladies
beautiful japanese scenery
modern cities and lovely countryside
interesting characters with funky backstories
and topped off with general fascinating japanlandia vibes

ichi ban!