Sunday, February 28, 2010
Saturday, February 27, 2010
777

777 is a auspicious number in many asian countries
777 was at some point a brand of cigarettes
777 is the title of a big fuckoff boeing flavoured aeroplane
777 is most likely a bus number in some rubbish places
777 is also the name of countless other shitty products and shonky services, some indeed possibly nearly as daft as...
777 is the number of this blog posting
Thursday, February 25, 2010
bogans and indians...
There are protests and sit ins and all kinds of righteous indignance and carry on as indian students here and commentators and politicians at home wax lyrical about their awful treatment. Australian politicians scurry off to india to kiss brown arse and reassure about how australia is safe place to send their money (i mean children, to come study in our expensive universities etc).
This horseshit is coming from a country with a caste system that rendered the majority of the population literally "untouchable"and religious and ethnic violence on a sickening scale, international sports teams are attacked and foreigners are targeted by terrorist groups. If you have slightly darker skin in india, you are a leper. Leading members of the Indian community in Australia, people that have been here for years, not just shown up to do a dodgy course to swindle residency and expecting special treatment, have come out to say that there is no history of indians being specifically targeted in racial violence.
The childish hysteria continues despite the fact that police and governmental statisticians clearly show that indians are much safer here than in their own country, are NOT targeted in racial attacks and often naively put themselves in situations where australians would not ie. suburban train stations at midnight
Australia has an unfortunate history of racism, just ask the indigenous locals, but spoilt indians who are used to others bowing and scraping to them are not suffering from it any more than other minority groups.
So shut the fuck up and read the following you over-privileged shit bags!
http://www.theage.com.au/national/localborn-more-at-risk-of-assault-20100218-oiuv.html
Local-born more at risk of assault
DAVID ROOD
February 19, 2010PEOPLE born overseas are less likely to be assaulted than those born in Australia, according to new Australian Bureau of Statistics data.
The national survey found that those born in Australia were more than twice as likely to be the victim of a physical assault.
It showed an assault rate of 3.6 per cent for Australian-born people, or 445,000 victims, compared with an assault rate of 1.7 per cent, or 82,000, for those born in other countries.
The new data comes as international debate rages over the extent of racism involved in the spate of attacks on Indian students.
The assault rate for people born in non-English speaking countries was 1.4 per cent.
The Crime Victimisation Survey found Victoria's assault rate of 3.3 per cent, or 142,000 victims, was above the national average of 3.1 per cent.
Opposition Leader Ted Baillieu seized on the report, saying it showed Victoria was not the safest state in the country, a claim regularly made by Premier John Brumby. ''Labor's policies have failed to properly protect Victorians, and violent crime is only increasing,'' he said.
Police Minister Bob Cameron said the survey confirmed the government faced a challenge to reduce Victoria's assault rate, but showed most Victorians felt safe.
''Our government has taken tough action to give police the powers they need to drive down assaults,'' he said.
The national Crime Victimisation Survey, conducted in 2008-09, asked more than 25,000 people aged 15 and older about their experience of crime.
It also found 77 per cent of female victims - as opposed to half of males - knew the offender, with just under half of the assaults occurring in the home.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Now that's a good idea, she said, she said
Switzerland millionaire hit by record speed fine
| The tycoon was reportedly driving a Ferrari 57km/h (35mph) over the limit |
A Swiss millionaire has been handed down a record speeding fine of $290,000 (£180,000) by a court.
The man was reportedly caught driving a red Ferrari Testarossa at 137km/h (85mph) through a village.
The penalty was calculated based on the unnamed motorist's wealth - assessed by the court as $22.7m (£14.1m) - and because he was a repeat offender.
It is more than double Switzerland's previous record speeding fine - handed to a Porsche driver in Zurich in 2008.
In the latest case, the motorist was clocked speeding 57km/h (35mph) faster than the limit, according to the cantonal court in St Gallen, eastern Switzerland.
"The accused ignored elementary traffic rules with a powerful vehicle out of a pure desire for speed," the court said in its judgement.
Swiss media reported that the man owns a villa with five luxury cars, including the Ferrari.
Next year-Swiss kid gets $52,000 fine for jaywalking...
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
the rainbow rinse...
lolling under a blanket
tiny fingers and impossibley tender
is that what they all rant about?
at only a few days old he's speaking in rhymes
he's wisely skeptical of that bobbed brunette
the former friend who lost herself
walking along the path by river
i know that brown river
i know that brown-haired girl
she now sits by the path
chattering with her girlfriends as girls will do
she brushes aside my salute
i walk on perturbed by this snub
emboldened and angered i turn on my heel
demand that we speak
demand that we parley
she doesnt care
so i tell her how crap and selfish she is
how she let us down
her friends are silenced and appalled
one of those friends is a face from the past
somebody who was in the right place at the wrong time
an orange crush?
she pursues me to scold
"dont i know you?"
fade to black
...
strolling by the same river in a different world
forget something or somebody
its necessary
climb up the stairwell
he man says its no good
you have to walk all the way back
skip to the camping
or was it someone else?
a bearded paternal figure
the campfire flames leap up and out
colouring the night sky
but not threatening
only in a picturesque manner
but the stairwell was so distant
all those posessions were unobtainable
my winter coat
the creased leather satchel
and the sagging canvas tent
...
Sunday, February 21, 2010
more days than two, less days than four
Three days was the morning.
My focus three days old.
My head, it landed to the sounds of cricket bows...
I am proud man anyway...
Covered now by three days...
Three ways was the morning.
Three lovers, in three ways.
We knew when she landed, three days she'd stay.
I am a proud man anyway...
Covered now by three days...
We saw shadows of the morning light
the shadows of the evening sun
till the shadows and the light were one.
Shadows of the morning light
the shadows of the evening sun
till the shadows and the light were one...
True hunting is over.
No herds to follow.
Without game, men prey on each other.
The family weakens by the bite we swallow...
True leaders gone, of land and people.
We choose no kin but adopted strangers.
The family weakens by the length we travel...
All of us with wings...
All of us with wings...
All of us with wings!
All of us with wings!
All of us with wings!
All of us with wings!
Erotic Jesus lays with his Marys.
Loves his Marys.
Bits of puzzle, hitting each other.
All now with wings!
'Oh my Marys! Never wonder... Night is shelter for nudity's shiver...'
All now with wings...
Friday, February 19, 2010
NFTB-News From The Behind...
headline-american christian missionaries in legal trouble in haiti for stealing children
dedline-shock as christians do something fucking stupid
headline-israel assassinates hamas leader using fake european passports
dedline-now that is fucking amazing considering how israel is normally not a complete and utter racist cunt of a country
headline-bomb blast in pakistans khyber region kills loads and injures loads more
dedline-religion is really and big clever innit?
headline-china has tanty about obama meeting dalai lama
dedline-phony communist tyrants dont like people with rhyming names meeting
headline-japanese whaling arseholes keep killing whales for 'science' and australian government is too chicken shit to say anything
dedline-Eugenics was considered a 'science' in nazi germany too, axis of coincidence?
headline-Leader of Australian 'Liberal' party and opposition leader tries to make political capital from human suffering.
dedline- little reptilian slimeball lives up to party tradition, ie tampa, indigenous people etc
Thursday, February 18, 2010
a tribute from madrid
EXACT translation:
"Hi i'm lovely Ana Ibanez Llorente from the Spanish national broacaster, RTVE, I love the limebeaver, I've even heard of him and think he is really hot, I cant wait to see him and snog him silly. www.limebeaver.blogspot.com is my favourite online place coz it's its full of fascinating, riveting and poignant stuff....
So, lets all send loads of wonga to its genial creator in 2010!"
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
a proper blog
not much chop really
a bit of a letdown in truth
and a bit thin around the edges
and the middle is mostly filler
what is required in this world is proper blogs
not this parade of pantywaste
blogs of consequence
blogs that provide valid social commentary
blogs that hold up a mirror to our world
blogs that tackle the big issues of which the traditional media is a'feard
cue http://niccageaseveryone.blogspot.com/
with more nicolas cage than one could possible hope for!
Monday, February 15, 2010
Sunday, February 14, 2010
bang bang doof doof
some butthole is going bang bang
and when he gets bored with that he goes doof doof
its most relaxing
whats he building in there?
perhaps hes a bloody christian
and god told him that he is no-a remeated
so hes constructing a new joanof
sure its been raining goats and llamas
but its no reason
and the colours take me down
to build a big arsed boat
unless hes not
maybe hes building a secret prison cell
to keep his prisoners in
the ones from the not-so-great-war
that wasnt at all the war-to-end-all-wars
there are rumblings on the streets
might be the articulated lollies
or the poor captured beings from lavatory 7
currenlty living under a pub
whats he building in there?
Saturday, February 13, 2010
almost famous

well, the next suburb across from it...
i've been hobnobbing
and not of the biscuit variety
hanging with the peeps
the peeps of the media biz
just the other day i was on the radio again
artfully cracking wise on politics
with my big mate biggsy
twere only recently that i was talking overseas airfares
and comparing exotic locales visited
with my super chum Bec
one time megastar in the firmament of audio goodness
golly gosh
the pressure!
im liable to go a bit bonkers
shave my head and go out without any knickers on!
cor blimey!
Thursday, February 11, 2010
an infinity of toilets and gates


everywhere i look
there they are
a parade of toilets
a promenade of gates
they are omnipresent
toilets! toilets! toilets!
gates! gates! gates!
perhaps the toilets seek me out...
maybe the gates think that im their cup of tea...
one doesnt like to presume
but two does.
i dont see what have i, what have i
done to deserve this...
i pray to almighty figa
i prey on unfriendly gophers
i sacrifice three dozen meat eaters trimesterally
but yet..
its fucking gates and toilets as far as the virtual eye can see
arse! shit! fuck! drink! girls! feck!
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
giant bird frenzy
in a shocking incident, fat-faced australian news bloke peter hitchener on Channel Shit As Possible was menaced by a giant seagull. It strutted past him then decided he was too much of a butthole and moved on...
next week: giant lavatory paper roll squashes reality dance show judge wanker...
Friday, February 05, 2010
eight times pank
there are only eight times pank!
i would have imagined there would be more!
at least a couple of dozen!
but thats how lacking the world is when it comes to pank!
SOD GLOBAL WARMING OF GAY PALESTINIAN WHALES, WE NEED MORE PANK!
Wednesday, February 03, 2010
arse shavin' with the window closed
what's that?
you dont care about football?
you dont like juvenile humour?
you think that puppets are crap?
you dont know who rooney, mourinho and eriksson are?
GOOD.
Tuesday, February 02, 2010
jackland and billian
he sure is taking his sweet time
just lounging about while the world spins madly
there's just no knowing which one will turn up
will it be japing and jovial jackland
or brilliant and bellicose billian
either one is fine by me
which is completely irrelevant coz I've got no say in it
the only sentient beings that even have the slightest idea
well
they are keeping their counsel to themselves
and rightly so
as they float above us
mostly
in the green lands
they will be the first to know
which of the chaps shows his face
or is
given the light...
Sunday, January 31, 2010
prince wholliam comes to visit
he got off with a koala and kissed a baby and the usual hogwash and the media went into a frenzy..
who gives a shit?


