Beavis & Butthead do no.34 - Cinderella

butt, butt, butt, butt, butt, butt, butt, butt, butt...

Nothing Compares 2Urinating standing up

i never really got sinead as a teen 

when i was getting into music

i wasnt inspired by furious post catholic female angst

despite the lovely jassy giving me the big hit 7 inch single for my 17th bday

in a bland shopping centre reproduced from a gringo corporate masterplan

that could have been in istanbul, johannesburg or bogota

(you too could look like arseville dakota!)

she just seemed like a funny talented madwoman

from a distance

she came across as a nutter

and a nutter she was

but she had a fucking point

(and it wasnt just that her trousers had rucked up!)

her rants about the catholic church were light years ahead of world events

and the doc has shown her to be far from the sensationalist freak that she was portrayed as at the time

she didnt shave her head to shock

she didnt say ugly truths to shock

she was bucking against the vicious hyper conservative ireland in which she lived

then she got ordained by some side church lot

later she became a muslim

because thats the only thinking christian thing to do etc etc

fuck all that sky high

she was a mighty brave, talented beast

in the form of a petite young woman

who faced an epic torrent of shit

from the (almighty) establishment

starring the self serving cuntery behemoth that is the catholic church

and the febrile bastion of ignorance which is the gringo christian right

((who wouldnt know a jebus if he showed up and shat in their letterboxes) AND left a calling card))

amongst others

which left an irreparable dent in her career

still

she did gain worldwide notoriety

(not that she sought it)

so much so that she became an ep cover

by the ultimate iconoclasts

after they got legally ken doned

btw 

i wonder how elke is doing...

how to measure like a brit

 

step one - remove any logical thoughts from brain

step two - good fucking luck

those lovely eccentric nutmegs, complicating life for no good reason

back in metropolis

You could sleep along the way

Dream in black and white...

fug life, tales of nonadventure 2

im fucked with being fucked ...

fug life, tales of nonadventure

tis a shit pick up line...

catarrh world cup update 2/12/22

 

this years world cup has been happily FULL of surprises

THE SUPRISERS

saudi! beat argentina!

japan! beat germany and spain and topped the group!

morocco! beat belgium and canada, drew with croatia. topped the group!

australia! beat denmark and tunisia and through

THE SURPRISEES

germany! lost to japan and OUT!

belgium! lost to morocco and OUT!

denmark! lost to australia, drew with tunisia and OUT!

catarrh! lost all games despite spending billions on stealing other nations players and FIRST OUT!

TWATS

ronaldo! tried to claim a team mates goal and was generally true his nature (a prat)

suarez! still pleased with himself for blatant past cheating

FIFA! still counting their billions of rials and pretending that human lives/rights dont matter

 

as we enter the fourth year...

 

I find covid's attention seeking pandemic based twattery even more annoying than years one to three...

hey j league, why no ichi ban thunderbastard dream lemurs?

ever wonder why japanese football teams have such comedic names?

if you speak a romance language (or german or dutch) it gets even funnier

which priceless linguistic clusterfuck is your team of cuore?

among the quality choices are-

tokyo greeny

leg osaka

kashima antlers

omiya squirrellel

yokahama s marinerereras

kawasaki frontal

kashima kingsun

windforest kofu

joy iwata

チーム不条理に行く！

evviva! qualcuno ha una mucchiata di candele?

e cosa abbiamo vinto?

------------

e per smentire una diceria banale che non muore mai...

help us santo sam and ed, youre our only hope! (at qatar 2022)

alas this is one empire that isnt striking back

at least we have tism not showing their faces again...

spot the twat no.14 - Gregoire de Fournas du RN

L'indignation à l'Assemblée nationale après des propos racistes. Lorsqu'un député noir prend la parole sur les migrants, un député du Rassemblement national crie "qu'il(s) retourne(nt) en Afrique"

parlait-il du navire ? pas du tout

on voit bien que le RN est toujours la meme merde raciste du FN que jamais, mais sous un nouveau déguisement.

fucking con repere'!

decision to quoi?

je n'avais rien compris.

comment c'etait possible que le type vivait avec la femme chinoise dans le milieu du film?

et apres, il n'a jamais été mentionné?

a part ca, c'est canon

만세!

All who have passed the age of thirty are joyless grotesques...

 

... endlessly fussing about things of no importance and staying alive, without, (so far as the child can see), having anything to live for. 

we are now further past the date for the setting of george orwells envisioned dystopia than that time is from when he wrote it.

coño eh?

we had the best time at your party

the wife and i thank you very much...

i dont know why

but i fucking love this song

it is damn hilarious

for a reason that cannot pin down

is it a piss take of adult MOR muzak?

a commentary on modern middle agers?

and is there just the faintest hint of swingerdom?

ween are known for all kinds of musical whackiness

but displaying real fucking genius

they can also make a 'straight' tune

thats swings along magnificently

seemingly without effort

le faux pas par excellence

 

'Le jour de la commémoration de la nuit du pogrom du Reich, offrez-vous un fromage plus tendre avec le poulet croustillant. maintenant chez kfcheese.'

ouaip, tu l'as bien lu.

kfc en allemagne a envoye un message 'push' sur sa application que suggere de celebrer 'kristallnacht', l'evenement vu comme le commencement de la shoah allemagne des juifs. genial! on va se souvenir le genocide avec la poule et frommage!

bravo! vous avez mis le pied taille trente dans votre bouche corporative!

juan heet juandas - the passions - im in love with a german film star

in the full post punk fundom of 1981

the passions put out a banger of a track

it was written by the vocalist about a former sex pistols and clash roadie

who had been a some german flix

no not that kind...

hows that for fucking random?

what attracted her to him?

was it that she had prescient knowledge that he would one day act in a film called 'penetration angst'?

did they ever get it on?

if so, was it angsty?

stay tuned to not find out a shitting thing!

transcrivint els ploros de rivers a València

once upon a time i went to valencia in spain

not

not palencia

nor

fnaalencia

nor valencia in venezuela, mexico, brazil

nor the other 54 other places called valencia

it was the tail end of summer

and it was lovely and sunny

i went there to visit carmen

 a cool chica i had met in rainy londres el ano pasado

despite me missing train stations 

and getting the hostels address wrong

(due to being a monoglot fool)

super patient carmen was a genial host

we went to a friends country place

with a bunch of her mates

ate REAL paella

(que es la unica paella que vale la pena, insistieron!)

and had a fun old time

(one of them was even a church fan!)

on the days when carmen was busy doing her thing

i wandered the town 

like a touristic clown

and one time 

ended up in an irish pub

in between pints of so so guinness

i got chatting with a couple of lovely valencian chicas

who were sitting there with a walkman

(old skool)

with their freshly purchased copy of pinkerton

trying to figure out the words

the were BIIIIG fans

they roped me into trying to figure out and transcribe

whatever the hell rivers cuomo was banging on about

i had heard some weezer

buddy holly obvs

that music vid!

and thought they were fun and pretty cool

but after an hour or so of trying to make sense of lyrics

i came to the conclusion that

rivers cuomo is a whiny little bitch

who just moaned about how hard his life is

in particular the being a rock star part

fun and cool?

more like moany and self indulgent

ive barely bothered to listen to them again

vés-te'n a la merda rivers

Zhōngguó on laowai...

honest, intelligent and thoughtful

去他妈的种族主义！

on this day dos - the scots did a hing

2nd November 1698 Scottish settlers make landfall in Panama, establishing the ill-fated 'Darien Venture' colony

Q - how did that work oot for ye hamish?

A 1 - (care of colonist Roger Oswald) ‘{Flour rations} When boiled with a little water, without anything else, big maggots and worms must be skimmed off the top… In short, a man might easily have destroyed his whole week’s ration in one day and have but one ordinary stomach neither… Yet for all this short allowance, every man (let him never be so weak) daily turned out to work by daylight, whether with the hatchet, or wheelbarrow, pick-axe, shovel, fore-hammer or any other instrument the case required; and so continued until 12 o’clock, and at 2 again and stayed till night, sometimes working all day up to the headbands of the breeches in water at the trenches. My shoulders have been so wore with carrying burdens that the skin has come off them and grew full of boils. If a man were sick and obliged to stay within, no victuals for him that day. Our Councillors all the while lying at their ease, sometimes divided into factions and, being swayed by particular interest, ruined the public… Our bodies pined away and grew so macerated with such allowance that we were like so many skeletons.’

A 2 -